Vulnerable Admission

I was at a conference for a couple of days and something that was said began a series of thoughts in my head. I am processing them as I type and am allowing you, the reader, in to a personal place to help me process these thoughts.

I believe that all of my life, my examples have been personalities. I mean, its pretty hard to get around it. If an example is a human, then that human is a personality. I believe that I have been under the leadership of huge personalities who have been pastors. I know, most “big-named” pastors are huge personalities.

I have seen success in my life as the “achievement of a big personality”……that is what has been modeled and what has been reinforced as success by every conference main speaker, book author…etc., etc…. not many pastors of normal size churches ever get a call from the majors to pinch hit-

I believe that I recognized a big flaw in myself today. I believe that I have limited God’s ability to work in my life by my focus being limited. You see, my focus has largely been myself. Let me say it this way. My focus has been “What Can I do for God’s kingdom?” What mark can “I” leave…what legacy can “I” leave?

So how is this limiting? It all has to do with what “I” can do or who “I” can become. It’ the cart pulling the horse and its the wrong motive leading me.

When I left Saddleback, I am beginning to see that a part of my “big personality” left. I think that there may have been a part of me that was very excited to be a part of the staff out West because of what I was going to be able to do and be. Did God do some amazing things in the hearts of many single adults? Absolutely. Did the ministry grow? Absolutely. Were Single adults valued like never before? Absolutely. Did we build a great team? 1000 times yes. But with that being said, there was something very comfortable knowing that when I made a phone call, people would answer and give me the time of the day. Now it is different.

I am at a church that was declining due to many factors. God is doing amazing things in and through me. The church is trending in a positive direction and I am beginning to see that God has given me a big personality, but it has little to do with the size of church where I am of what I have done. It has so much more to do with God using that personality, my giftings for His glory.

The biggest thing I ever may do is see my children graduate high-school, college (if they choose), get married (if God calls) – and that is 100% o.k.
The biggest thing I ever may do may be pouring into a young pastor that God has his hand on and be his support-and that o.k.
The biggest thing I ever may do is help those that follow me do bigger and better things…and that’s o.k.
The biggest thing I ever may do I may already have done…and that’s o.k.
I may not right a great book
I may not pastor the largest church in the country
I may never be asked to speak at a conference…..o how I want these things….but if they never happen….that’s o.k.
If the biggest thing I ever do is be obedient to the Lord and His calling on my life- that’s “well done”

I am a complicated pastor with a complicated mind- I have many battles that I wage war against daily. Thanks for processing this with me….

could not believe this sign

I was at a funeral for a family member on Sunday, January 11,2009 and saw this sign. it was directly across the street from the little country church where my great grandad was pastor many years ago. I am glad I had my phone with me to take a picture! I don’t know if people would have believed me if I told them about this sign. I guess they really dont like cars in front of their house?

Full of Joy, mmedia Ustream.TV: FBC-Coppell (December 14,2008)–Clayton Coates, Sr Pastor speaks on the notion becoming “Full of Joy” during the holiday

Webcam chat at Ustream

New paint on our new house

I cannot tell you how thrilled I am that we have new paint on our new house! It really looks great! If you are not from Texas, you may not know why our windows look black. Those are solar screens that you install to lower the energy consumsion of your house. 8 years of marriage, 4 children, 10 houses layer….and we are beginning to feel settled! Thank you God!

Storytime Elmo @ the Coates’

The girl’s Aunt Leigh and Uncle Dan sent them Elmo live yesterday in the mail. I didn’t know what all of the fuss was about it but now I get it. It is a very cool toy and captures the attention of a 6 year old down to 5 months.

Aware

Yes, I am fully aware that my posts have been very scattered and random. This is due in part to the fact that I am still in a state of transition. There have been some immediate situations that I have had to address, however, all is going well. We have closed on our home and have been in it for 10 days. It is kinda crazy though because there are no blinds on the windows….but there will be soon…. they should be up this week. The house gets scraped on and caulked today and painted next weekend. We have painted the girls room and will paint two others and do a little demo in the living room…that is just the home side of things. Ella turns 6 today….amazing how time passes yet I can remember almost every day of her life. I am excited for her and her growth in the Lord. 

We have all of our positions filled as of this coming week. I had to do some outsourcing and combining but to a substantial savings in the end. Paint and carpet is going in and the new cleaning service will help maintain the ascetic value of the building…both inside and out. A new playground and the support and training of small group hosts will be the next thing on the plate as well as the launching of a new “vintage” service which will be very classical in style….and theres more…- 

Excited to be used “FULLY” by God….for so much of the past few years I seemed like a ball of potential just sitting there wasting as if “on call.” I was being pinched at Saddleback but never ever squeezed…God has moved my family on to a place where we can make a difference. I am grateful daily…

On the plane

We headed to the airport this morning and blasted off to TX. I say blasted because when you take off from John Wayne airport, you literaly take blast off. There is a noise abatement in Newport beach which causes all of this….but I don’t mind at all. It is pretty fun to say the least!

I am sitting on the plane with my family truly amazed. I don’t know of a family in the world that God could have more richly blessed me with. Daily I am amazed at their unconditional love and support. None of us expects perfection from one another but rather grace. I watched my kids sit through an hour wedding and wondered just how many kids could do something like that.

We have our melt-down moments for sure, myself included. But life is good and we only God to tell thanks.

Now Allison, she is not defineable. She is beauty, love, God’s grace, forgiveness, support, gentleness, trust, faith, answered prayer/ prayer warrior, peace, self-control, wonderful mother, caring wife, and many more words that fall short all rolled up into one. We together are one just as God intended and she makes me better in just about every area of my life. I could not imagine this transition without her!

So here we are on the plane….ready, thankful for God using is….

Last elevation

Allison and I are sitting our last Elevation listening to Tommy teach on parenting. It’s worth a listen to this weekend at http://www.saddlebackfamily.com

Next week…First Coppell!

the new-ness of moving and the sadness of letting go

The Coates family is in the midst of a lot of different emotions. We are so excited, unbelievably excited, about our present and future move to lead FBC Coppell. Yet at the same time, we have (and are welcoming) the sad emotions of having to let go of so many wonderful relationships that we have built here in the O.C. 

I saw a friend at Starbucks (I wonder how many times that phrase is blogged on a daily basis) and was talking to him about the move and everything. I told him that moving and saying “good-bye” was a hazard of the job. We know it going in to each situation that God has prepared for us. We know that more than likely, at some point God will move us on to another task….but it is still worth building the relationships with people. We need relationships and each one of these brings glory to God. 

We know that all of our relationships will change…but never end and that brings great joy to our hearts!

Crazy emotional for women’s gymnastics???

O.K. – so I am literally wiping tears away as I watch Nastia and her father during the women’s all-around at the Olympics. I am thinking to myself, “self, why in the world are you emotional?” I answered self, “self, its because you always get emotional when you see a daughter interact in such a loving way with her father.” I mean, can you imagine how many times they have probably been at odds with one another? Her father is not only her father but also her coach. I am sure there were so many times that he had to push his daughter to a near breaking point because he knew it was going to be the best for her in the future as it would prepare her for a moment such as last night. Wow! It reminds me of that old tv show “Father knows best.” 

I know you know where I am going with this. God loves us so much…much more deeply than we will ever fully recognize or comprehend. His love for us moves Him to grow us and prepare us for the challenges that life has to offer. His desire is to see us up on the podium of life as we are rewarded with the very crown of life which is eternity. And as we are going through our ups and downs, twists and turns, spills, falls and the like, He is right there watching us, ready to catch us if we fall, ready to hold us, ready to tell us exactly what we need even if it is not what we “want to hear.” 

God’ love for us is so BIG yet His love for Himself is ever BIGGER…and that’s O.K. because HE is GOD and HE makes the rules! You see, in the end, as He looks at us on the podium of life, He is the one that receives the most GLORY!